Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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