Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Dicks are not precious.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
