Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
