I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
