I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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