This house was built for laser tag.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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