I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
