dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
