i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
