I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
