p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
