So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
i've created a new STD.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
