I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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