he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Actions speak louder than pants.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
