Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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