plz talk dirty to me
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
