i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
