i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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