Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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