my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
