I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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