I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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