people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize