What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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