Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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