Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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