so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
