you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Randomize
