OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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