that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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