What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Someone came in the potted fern
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
