So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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