Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Randomize
