Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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