I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
this hospital has no fireball
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
