So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize