can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Every concussion has its silver lining
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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