TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
