i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
dude i'm inner monologue high
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
why do cheetos always look like penises
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
