some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
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