i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
