therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Michael Bay diarrhea
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
