Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
The adults are the big ones right?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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