...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
