Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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