I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
