He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
