it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
nutella sex= disaster
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
