Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just made out with a guy for $7.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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