Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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